It’s been two years

It has been two years since we lost our sweet Trinity. I still can not quit replaying that day in my mind. I would’ve hoped it would have gotten easier to remember just the good things. With all deaths, I’ve had a list of “should’ve, would’ve, could’ve” but not like her unexpected death. I won’t rehash what I’ve already said. I’ll just try to cherish each day I have with those I love and not constantly think that it may be the last time. Kinda weird you hardly ever never know when “the last time” is.

The first few months of every year have some not great anniversary dates. It was my mother-in-laws birthday. She passed away the day after. It was my father-in-laws birthday and he’s gone too. One day in February was both my mom and dad’s birthdays, and he passed just 10 days after turning 61. Then Trinity passed on March 2nd. Now, I do thankfully have some good dates in there. It’s my mom, aunt, uncle a few cousins and friend birthdays’, plus Valentine’s Day which I get to spend with my soulmate.

Okay, let me stop being sappy and talk about Tyler because in just a few months he will have his second birthday without his sister when he turns 13. 

Shortly after we lost Trinity, my cousin/vet was in town, I asked her to listen to Tyler’s heart and she heard a grade 2 heart murmur. Both Tyler and Trinity had been to my local vet just 5 days before she passed away and both had gotten a clean bill of health. So, now Trinity was gone and I learned about Tyler’s murmur.

REACH had a visiting feline cardiologist from Charleston SC who came a few times per month. I put Tyler on the waitlist with a note that I could come early if they got a cancelation. They did. Dr. Jesty saw Tyler and said that on chamber had an irregular shape in the lining but it if it was HCM, that it was too early to know for sure. She said to come back in one year and they’d do another echocardiogram and compare the two findings. Then they’d know if it was age-related or a problem. There is a blood or saliva test (I forget) but it is typically followed by an order for an echo anyway so I chose to go right to the echo. Of course, there is DNA testing too but they’d still be followed with the echo and even if a cat is not positive for the gene, they can still have it. It would be kinda neat to see how much Ragdoll my boy has though.

A year later, around Tyler’s last birthday, my local vet did hear the murmur this time and he said he heard a grade 2 also. I haven’t made his appointment yet this year. I did, however, call to get Tyler in for his follow-up echo only to find that the cardiologist doesn’t come to WNC anymore. 😦

I could drive Tyler to Raleigh NC, or Charleston SC to see a feline cardiologist. That would stress him out. I probably jumped the gun a little when I wanted him in after losing Trinity so unexpectedly. But they were littermate siblings. I wrote to Dr. Jesty and asked if she would please save my contact info and call me if she ever started coming back to our area again.

I had intentions of getting a better dental x-ray when he went for his second echo since my vet can’t really do the close one that shows any detail and below the gum line showing FLORS before it’s visible on the exposed tooth. Tyler has had two extractions at two different times. He did really bad after the first one and looked like he was way more bothered and in pain than he was before the extraction. I’d hoped to get a good close up x-ray that showed if any other teeth had problems instead of just putting him under over and over when the next tooth shows painful FLORS tooth resorption.

I’ve been trying to get a video of Tyler’s puffing out cheeks for ages too but usually when I grab the phone or camera he quits. At first, I thought it was a stuffy nose but then I saw this cheeks puffing out on exhale. Guess it’s from the pulled teeth letting the air puff them out?  Goes right along with his happy drooling.

I’ve noticed his hips and back legs bother him with his arthritis, and more and what we call his “nerves getting him”. Hubby finally got a video of that for just a second but I can’t get the video off his iPhone since it’s so large and Apple isn’t as good about sharing as Android! I haven’t bought or had hubby make ramps yet but I have padded all his beds more (which was an ordeal) and moved furniture around to make kind of steps so he had to jump less. I give him Cosequin and Dasaquin, plus omega oil. He does tend to sneeze quite a bit when he first wakes up, and I swear it looks like all his dreams are nightmares. The dream and nerve thing he’s done all his life.

I bought him orthopedic beds and learned he doesn’t like lumpy. I bought a smooth flat one but it had a tag about the dye that was a known carcinogen. Really? You know that was returned! Why even sell that for something our furbabies are going to lay on? I ended up buying 2 of the flat heat retention pads like he already had and added them to a big bed. That seemed to be acceptable. I was considering buying him a cave bed for our bedroom because he burrows under the covers but our bed is fairly high. I had a full-size comforter for sale that was still in the plastic zipper back for $15.00. I decided to unlist it, unzip the bag and see if Tyler liked it. He LOVES his cave-like purrito bed.

We’ve been working in the yard a lot again so I moved his bed and window lookouts around so he can see us outside better. The room looks like I don’t know how to decorate. I think he likes it better, if not for being able to see or hear us better but for the increased sun. He’s gotten colder natured the older he has gotten. Trinity always loved the sunshine but she was skinny and had white fur and migrated right to it as a kitten. Dark fur and plenty of padding made it an acquired thing for Tyler.


It is also coming up on the book anniversary of  You Had Me at Meow; Considerations before Adopting your Cat. See

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6 thoughts on “It’s been two years

  1. Kate Crimmins

    I can relate to this. One month after a complete bill of health, I lost my Hazel to congestive heart failure and a very large tumor that was pressing on her lungs. How could they have missed that? I became very concerned about everything Mollie. She was 2 years older and she was grumpy. I didn’t think she felt good. We did blood work, x-rays and an ultrasound. They did find that her esophagus doesn’t close properly. It may give her reflux. They gave me an antibiotic and eventually a steroid but I’m still concerned. She’s going in shortly. My problem is that the next test for an esophagus issue is a scope which requires anesthesia. At 16 she’s old for that. I have set up an electric heating pad (for cats) for her to sleep on and strategically placed some furniture so she doesn’t have to jump so high. I am convinced some of his is a reaction to feeling so guilty about missing Hazel’s symptoms. Some of it is just me wanting to be sure she is happy until the end. Good luck to you with your cat’s heart issue. I am lucky that we have some specialists locally. I had to use one for the ultrasound.


    1. KiM Post author

      As much as I’ve tried I really can’t see that Trinity had any symptoms. I think it was sudden. She had 3 seizures years before but the only out of the ordinary thing was the vet visit 5 days earlier for their yearly and they had a horrible time getting blood. She acted normal that morning. Then again, my vet didn’t hear Tyler’s murmur either. I did just have a friend who had to put her cat to sleep months after a scope. The esophagus was scared and her cat couldn’t eat anymore. So sad, when you try to do the right things. I’ve worked in the yard all week and I’m so darn tired but I’m going to muster the energy to vacuum today because Tyler is sneezing. I’ve already put water bowls on all the heat registers. Then maybe we can squeeze in a nap?!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Kate Crimmins

        Yes, they had gone through all the possible (very bad) things that could happen to the esophagus. I don’t know if she’s uncomfortable. She is a loved cat. Knowing when is so hard. So far she’s eating, drinking, pooping and peeing. She even purrs.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Anonymous

        Kimberly, it usually is sudden. i’ve Been a Ragdoll Breeder for over 27 yrs. Let me help you. DNA testing is key. Call me at 610-687-2227. I’ll help you figure it out. I’m also an RN. Leslie


        1. KiM Post author

          Hi Leslie, thank you for reaching out. I am aware of the DNA testing, and how HCM runs more in Maine Coons and Ragdolls. Very thoughtful of you. ~



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